"listened as the person preached about forgiveness" (S55)

listened as the person preached about forgiveness, and how in a world so unforgiving and so brutal, there was a God out there who always forgave you. She thought about what had happened in the last few days and her eyes stung with bitter tears as she considered how much forgiveness meant to her. She thought of how others refused to forgive her, and how she refused to forgive herself for events in her life. She held on to bitter feelings as hot and heavy as a coal burning out at the bottom of a fire. She was weighed down this lack of forgiveness so much that sometimes these burning coals coalesced together to form a weighted blanket that pressed down on her entire body in the mornings. The truth was, she was struggling to leave her bed most days. Yet, the person on the video was smiling and exclaiming about this all loving God who would forgive time after time if we invited him in to our lives. He spoke of how the christian God was also kind, generous and all powerful. She didn’t understand how all of these things could be true all at once, and in one person. But, what she found most admirable about the man was the genuine joy and passion that leaked and effervesced from the words he spoke. It didn’t look like he was making it up, it seemed like he genuinely believed it. So, she put down her found and spoke to God. She waited a few seconds, minutes, hours. But, the sky was empty.